Besides eating everything that didn't stay still at Yountville's Bistro Jeanty, making that joke about my survival skills was probably the best thing to come out of my tandem-traveling-in-silent-contempt through California's rustically aristocratic Napa Valley.
Does California look like a movie set, or do movie sets look like California?
Napa has wine. That's good.
The catacombs of Jarvis Vineyards.
It also has shops targeting the bougie-and-buzzed perimenopausal set, vending fur vests and artfully-distressed jeans that I came to call "cougar pelts."